Many things have happened since the last post, but they are insignificant in comparison to what is on my mind now.
Some friends just told me that I seem to have no empathy. I'm not sure if that's what they really meant because their explanation is that I'm never down, that I'm always happy.
Is that a lack of empathy?
Yet when I made a bad joke after one said that her throat was still sore after a week, she cited that as another example.
This reminds me of my old suspicion that I really do lack empathy - I simply cannot feel sorry for others, despite all the proper things I say when I encounter such situations that call for them.
It's not that I consciously, deliberately don't feel sorry for them; I just can't feel anything when someone tells me his grandma just passed away, nor happy when someone gets married. So there, the truth is out.
I know that makes me a terrible friend and one of those aforementioned friends did say that it makes me hard to connect with, but I can't help it! I'm not trying to not give a fuck; I just have no fucks to give!
And you know what I get when I google "lack of empathy"? Narcisstic personality disorder.
It's impossible, IMHO, that I'm as abrasive as the examples frequently cited in those articles, but the fact is that I'm hitting 30 and my social circles are small enough to be symptoms of an underlying problem. Something is probably wrong somewhere and that needs to be solved ASAP.
